Uncertainty as... an Advantage?

Some thoughts on uncertainty came to me today — in the form of a joke.

Psychologist:

– Tell me, what’s troubling you?

Client:

– Self-doubt. I’ve always been this way.

Psychologist:

– What does confidence mean to you? I’m sure you’ve had experiences where you did something with confidence. What was that like for you?

Client:

– You know, the one thing I’m certain of is that I’m not certain of anything. That, I’m 100% sure of.

Let me add to the joke above. It’s a bit like “all I know is that I know nothing.” But let me explain where I’m going with this :) The thing is, uncertainty can actually be an advantage — a genuine strength. How is that possible? We’ve always been taught that uncertainty is bad, that this flaw needs to be eliminated, and that it’s hard to achieve anything in life if you’re not confident in yourself. I used to think so too. But is it really true? Does it really need to be eliminated? Who says so and why? What if we step a little away from the black-and-white framing of Confidence vs. Uncertainty? In what ways does uncertainty actually help?

I’d like to offer you a slightly different perspective on uncertainty. It has many advantages, because it:

• helps you avoid dangerous and unpleasant situations. Yes, avoidance isn’t always colored only in negative tones — the ACT model also acknowledges that avoidance is not always problematic behavior;
• buys time to think things through properly before making an important decision, preventing hasty choices;
• helps you become more competent in your field, because you put more effort into reaching your goals and refining your skills;
• can help you preserve relationships with people who matter to you, so you communicate more consciously and deliberately.

Everything I’ve said about uncertainty applies when you are guided not by fear of making mistakes as your primary motive, but by your values as a compass or guiding direction. In this way, you act more consciously. It’s normal to doubt yourself on the road to your goals. You can actually ask Uncertainty a question, as if it were a character: what is it trying to tell you? Most likely, Uncertainty is signaling that whatever you’re reaching for matters deeply to you. You don’t have to see Uncertainty as an enemy; you can see it as an advisor or a friend who’s suggesting you not dive in headfirst right away, but think things over carefully first. Uncertainty rarely comes alone — quite often it brings along its companion, Anxiety. Can you keep moving forward despite Anxiety, letting it simply be there? How can you support yourself right now?

That said, it’s a different matter when fear or anxiety grow so large alongside uncertainty that they paralyze all activity and prevent any action at all. In that case, it makes sense to explore the fear and anxiety more deeply. Quite often they are fueled by uncomfortable thoughts about all kinds of catastrophic outcomes. In such a situation you might try:

a) placing fear and anxiety somewhere, even on a sheet of paper, and marking their intensity (on a scale from 1 to 10);

b) articulating what the worst possible outcome would be. Identify the point you’re at right now. How likely is it that “this horror” will actually happen? What specifically might lead to it? If the outcome is very unpleasant and you believe the probability is extremely high, sketch out a plan of action. Our brain loves certainty and calms down when there’s a sense of what options exist if things go wrong.

So, uncertainty isn’t always a flaw, and paradoxically, by acting from conscious uncertainty, you are actually strengthening your confidence, refining your skills and competencies. With that approach, it’s very hard to go without victories — big and small. Knowing how to notice them and celebrate them is a whole other story, and an equally important one :)